Truly Disappointing

Friday, February 17, 2006

Because it's funny

http://haikumoviereviews.blogspot.com/

I'll figure out how to link this appropriately later. Hate HTML. But anyway, this site? Funny.

Thursday, February 16, 2006

I Just Started Watchin This Show

You scored as Serenity (Firefly). You like to live your own way and don’t enjoy when anyone but a friend tries to tell you should do different. Now if only the Reavers would quit trying to skin you.

Serenity (Firefly)

81%

SG-1 (Stargate)

75%

Babylon 5 (Babylon 5)

69%

Enterprise D (Star Trek)

69%

Deep Space Nine (Star Trek)

63%

Bebop (Cowboy Bebop)

63%

Millennium Falcon (Star Wars)

63%

FBI's X-Files Division (The X-Files)

63%

Moya (Farscape)

63%

Nebuchadnezzar (The Matrix)

56%

Andromeda Ascendant (Andromeda)

50%

Galactica (Battlestar: Galactica)

50%

Your Ultimate Sci-Fi Profile II: which sci-fi crew would you best fit in? (pics)
created with QuizFarm.com

The Matrix Has Me

You scored as Nebuchadnezzar (The Matrix). You can change the world around you. You have a strong will and a high technical aptitude. Is it possible you are the one? Now if only Agent Smith would quit beating up your friends.

Nebuchadnezzar (The Matrix)


100%

Moya (Farscape)


94%

SG-1 (Stargate)


94%

Enterprise D (Star Trek)


88%

Deep Space Nine (Star Trek)


88%

Andromeda Ascendant (Andromeda)


81%



apparently? I need to watch the show.

You scored as Galactica (Battlestar: Galactica). You are leery of your surroundings, and with good reason. Anyone could be a cylon. But you have close friends and you know they would never hurt you. Now if only the damn XO would stop drinking.

Galactica (Battlestar: Galactica)

75%

Deep Space Nine (Star Trek)

69%

Babylon 5 (Babylon 5)

69%

Moya (Farscape)

69%

Millennium Falcon (Star Wars)

69%

SG-1 (Stargate)

69%

Enterprise D (Star Trek)

63%

Serenity (Firefly)

63%

Nebuchadnezzar (The Matrix)

63%

Bebop (Cowboy Bebop)

56%

FBI's X-Files Division (The X-Files)

50%

Andromeda Ascendant (Andromeda)

44%

Your Ultimate Sci-Fi Profile II: which sci-fi crew would you best fit in? (pics)
created with QuizFarm.com

I Heart Starbuck (And Not Just For Her Coffee, Either)

Okay, so basically the love affair with Grey's Anatomy is that you guys can identify with the characters. Fair enough. Is it an insult or a compliment to compare it to Ally McForTheLoveOfGodEatSomething? For the record, us boyz also like to know and care about characters. We also like for things to blow up, get shot up, or beat up.

Susan, obviously I am not a fucking loser, cuz BG is the best thing on TV, period. I love how they took a cheesy 80s sci-fi show and made it darker, more realistic (in a sense, anyway). Not only that, but they took one of the main characters and changed gender on us. Gotta admit, Starbuck is cute when she's angry, which is a lot. I even converted the SO into watching it, and she hates sci-fi. It is a fascinating look into the darker side of our own culture, the notion that the world consists of shades of grey, not black and white. So yes, by all means watch it if you haven't already. The Cylons Were Created By Man. There Are Many Copies. And They Have A Plan. The Plan is to get you to watch Battlestar Galactica--Sci-Fi Network Fridays, at 10PM Eastern :)

Speaking of good shows, a moment of silence for what I considered to be the best written comedy series ever, Arrested Development. We hardly knew ye. But I think after an ending such as they recently had, you really can't bring the series back. It did what it had to do, let it end in the best possible way.

As a rule, I don't watch anything on UPN or the WB. Well, I did make an exception for Everybody Hates Chris.

The Mind of the Modern Gal

ok greys anatomy, great show for precisely the reason kt mentioned, character development. me and i think most women love character driven shows. we dont need bombs or car chases we need people we can relate to. we are social beings by nature and we are drawn to similar situations. and greys anatomy is great because the characters arent completely cookie cutter and they show a modicum of diversity. they arent stupid people, theyre human. they dont go for the easy laughs on the laugh track and they deal with real people shit. and damn if i dont love love love sandra oh. shes the bizzomb behind lisa loeb. ok, maybe equal to lisa but in a different way.

and yeah, as kt said, mcdreamy does not get a pass. hes an ass but they make us feel about him what meredith does and thats conflicted. hes cute and mcdreamy but hes an ass (and a typical guy if you ask me, but i digress). he is ball-less and a fucker and needs to shit or get off the pot, but the thing is, most people are just like him. and many women are just like meredith. i mean shit, we've all found ourselves in those situations where we know better but just cant help ourselves. thats how i was with garrett. i hate shows that show characters making such easy choices out of real life hard choices, it aint realistic.

but of course it being entertainment there is that element of fiction and show-ness. but overall its still a good enough show to draw me in and keep me there. another show like that is related. pinky, seriously, check out related on the wb on mondays. cute show. higher calibre than most of those dumb-coms out there.

and heres my soapbox moment, if yall havent seen battlestar galactica yet youre fucking losers!!! its hands down one of the best dramas on tv. dont dismiss it because its sci fi. its more poly sci, classical philosophy, and human drama than anything. it deals with issues such as abortion, cloning, the black market, and torture during wartime. its one of the best crafted and timely shows out there. and theres hot people, but thats just the cherry on top. seriously, check it out please. you are missing out.


ok, now an update on pascal the french guy. emailed him and told him no dice, but in a friendly way. he typed back and said he agreed, but would be up for other friend activities. well thats nice. no messy bullshit.

was typing hot and heavy with another dude, gregory the graphic designer, but he seems to have houdinied lately. go fig.

as for marine twin, he seems like hes a little below my maturity level. im writing him off. no longer interested after a dumb IM i had with him the other night.

and finally, dave the vet tech. things seem to be going ok there. he suggested the punchline for sunday but theres gonna be a hypnotist. um, NO. i refuse. i friggin hate hypnotists. they are seriously not funny to me. sorry, but they arent. theyre like mimes...not funny. we've continued to email and turns out he was of the same mind as me during our last date...he wanted to make out (to use high school terms) but because our cars were parked in different places it just didnt come about. thats kinda nice to know he was interested in checking out my kiss action. though i have to say now that ill be pins and needles on the next date because ill know its coming. nerveracking i tell ya! lol! so now i need to come up with another activity. any suggestions? ill keep yall posted.

and dammit, kt, wheres the vday brad update post! come on! im dyin here yo! i wont be available for the phone until friday. pins and needles.

oh, finally, before i forget, got an email from A my asshole ex-bf aka the doggie abandoner. he reassured me he wasnt gonna just dump hudson off at the pound or human society or into the wild. he said hed take care of him until he can find someone who loves him as much as he does. if thats true then im much less concerned now than before. i am still gonna try hard to find him a good new home.

soooooo if anybody knows anybody, please lemme know! hudson is a great doggie who deserves a great home!

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Characters versus Bombs

Character development is key, for many women. I think we want to know and care about the characters.

Derek (the cheater) does NOT get a free pass in my book and frankly, though I understand Meredith (the protagonist) still being in love with him, to a degree, the story line needs to Move On. The dude is a ball-less, spine-less ass. He not only slept with and pursued Meredith, but after she found out he was married, he wooed her back and led her to believe that he was leaving his cheating wife. Mr and Mrs McDreamy DESERVE each other.

I can relate to the other characters. Christina (Sandra Oh) is conflicted. She wants to be in the relationship she's in with Burke but does not want to be sidetracked from her dreams of being a top-notch surgeon. Burke can relate, but he's secure in his career and she's just starting out. The relationship? Could get in her way if she can't find the balance. I have little balance (physically) and worry about my balance in other areas of my life. Like most humans who have their basic needs secured, I gravitate towards the pleasure zones in my life. This can easily lead to lack of balance.

Izzy? Likes the bad boy. The asshole with the push-and-pull relationship mentality. She is conflicted because her outward, I-worked-my-way-through-med-school-as-a-model belies her inner reality: that she's an intelligent, hard-working surgeon who grew up in a trailer park and gave a child up for adoption when she was very young. Because she wanted more for herself and her offspring. The inner/outer dichotomy? Is another thing that I struggle with. Funny, for those of you who know me, but people where I work see me as perky and cheerful. They see bits of the smartass, but the stubborn, sarcastic, conflicted person who hates people most days? I keep her inside.

Alex, the asshole, is scared that he doesn't have what it takes. As a surgeon or as a boyfriend/lover. So he rejects the friendship and camaraderie of the others on his "team" and is prickly so they don't come too close: human cactus. He wants Izzy but rejects her, too. Maybe he likes her too much, can relate to her and open up to her too easily, and so he pushes her away, too, out of fear. I can relate to him, too.

So, I guess I'm saying that I, personally, watch and like the show because I can relate to the characters and some of their dilemmas -- though not having my hand on a bomb or sleeping with an asshole of a married man. Though, really, those are both Meredith story lines and I don't relate to her. In fact, even in my not-eating state, I want to feed her a cheeseburger. With onion rings and fries with gravy -- mostly because the gravy is lard-based, not because fries with gravy is a good thing. Her collarbone is an orange-alert on the Fug Terror scale.

Honestly? I had no idea I had so much to say about this show! But I'm glad your SO has good taste in TV, Pinky.

KABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM (aka All I Need To Know About Grey's Anatomy)

What is it with this show? Is it the second coming of Ally McBeal? All the women love it, all the men are forced to watch it. My thing is that (from what little of it that I've seen) women would HATE to be in some of these situations in real life. Why does the one doctor seem to get a pass even though he didn't tell the one girl he was married and then decided to go back to his wife? How does that same girl (the main character, I was told here recently) go on with her life in the scenes from the next episode after what she just went through? How do you go from I nearly died, then watched someone die right in front of me, to let's everyone have sex and be happy? To be fair, the writing and character development seem to be excellent, so I can see why a lot of people have been talking about it. Personally, I'm going to start referring to it as the female version of pro wrestling. Give me 24 and The Shield. I need my violence. But I am interested to know what exactly it is about this show that women love so much... is it the dreamy characters? is it the drama? Tell me something...

As for the O'Malley dude, I know the type very well... quiet, reserved, wouldn't dream of hurting anyone or being aggressive... until the situation calls for it and he's someone's only hope. That's exactly the way I am. He's the guy that always gets screwed over by the cute girls who want to date the bad boys. Years later, the cute girls come back to him AFTER getting screwed over, when they come to their senses and want someone they can trust. And yes, this does apply to men as well. We like bad girls until we want to settle down. Then we just don't want bad girls as much :)

I think you do have to lose at least part of yourself in someone else to be in a relationship. You should definitely be cognizant of not losing all of yourself, but don't get too wrapped up in not letting it happen. I guess what I'm missing here is that are you saying at the root of it all, you can't really define yourself? I would think that your core being doesn't really change much, no matter what happens to you. I read my old diaries and that angry sex-obsessed high schooler and I still have a lot of things in common, even though we sound and act like two different people. Are you changing because you want to change, or are you changing because you feel like the world is changing you?

Nice Guys get the Shaft, or Why I'd date George O'Malley

First, a response or two:
S wanted to say hi and share some good work news (patent was issued, rock on). We chat maybe twice a year, just catch up on what the other is doing. It's nice. We always were better friends than anything else. He's a good person.

My exes:
Ex #1, who told all of our friends I was a lesbian when we broke up, married and had a child with a lesbian. He's now remarried and the blended family is fleshed out at 4 kids total. Not sure whose is which. Hear from him by e-mail maybe once a year, but that only started a few years back when he tracked me down to say his grandfather had died. His grandfather was an awesome person.

Ex#2, read above. Is single.

Ex#3 is getting married in July, I hear. His mom and mine are good friends. I hear from him professionally on occasion.

Ex#4 is somewhere here in town. I've seen him twice in 6 months, both times because his work brings him in to my office occasionally.

Now, this is the thing. I've been REALLY lucky, or I'm just so picky about getting involved that I've created luck, but I've not really been screwed over. Things have gotten fucked up. No doubt. But I've not been cheated on and I've not been Houdini'd. The guys I've dated? Have been nice guys. My mother met and liked, well, all of them. Not that that's much of a gauge, since my mother likes almost everyone. But overall? I'm not attracted to the bad boys. I like them relatively clean-cut, somewhat intellectual, definitely sarcastic, and nice. They've just all not been the right guys, I guess.

You know, the downside of having hangups is that it takes you years to pick out what your specific problem is. Whether you can trace it to its origins or not, fixing it by change of behavior is difficult. So you end up stuck in the same holding pattern until you can get out a map and trace a new route. But if you aren't paying enough attention to the ground, you may not notice that you're going in circles. It's like hunting the Heffalump.

Back to the story.



George O'Malley. Character on Grey's Anatomy, which is one of my favorite shows on TV right now.

George is kind of a dork. He's socially bumbling. He could use a haircut. But he's the go-to guy. He can grab a beating heart in an elevator. He can self-righteously demand that HE is more important than a dog. He can give pep talks to Dr. Bailey in labor. He's sweet. And loyal. Unthreatening and kind. And would probably be the most devoted significant other on the planet. Granted, he's rough around the edges, but then, the character is, I believe, around my age. In his late 20s. We don't have everything figured out yet, not at this age, and he's at the beginning of his career, so still unstable there. He is still potential.

and seriously? The eyes? HOT. Sorry. They are.

I'd date George O'Malley. The problem is that I'm still potential, too, and every time I get my feet planted on firm ground (or think I have), some sort of earth-moving event takes place and I'm thrown once again for a loop. I am not expecting me to be a finished personality ever -- I am a progressive work in progress, permanently in flux. But I'd like to feel steady. I'd like to know I'm not losing me in whatever earth-shattering moment I share with another person.

I'm a control freak. I know it. What can I say? I've not yet figured out how to change that.

My Life Is An Open Book

Happy post V-Day, everyone. V-Day is one of my favorite holidays, whether I'm single or with someone. Just my two cents. Ah, L'Amour.

As far as being open with someone, I completely feel that the more open you are with someone, the closer you are to them emotionally. I'm not sure I see a way in which you can be emotionally close to someone when you don't really know what they are thinking, or if they are hiding significant aspects of their being from you. This is not to say that it can't be done, however. I believe that in life, you will be really close to a few people in an overall sense. You will bond with many other folks over a few certain things. Some people you will bond with over a singular thing. I believe each of these types of bonds is capable of being of similar strength, but the overall bonds I would imagine will be the very strongest. In other words, the emotional bonds that are quickly built between people who survive a plane crash can be (or appear to be) just as strong as those between lifelong friends, but in reality don't have the same durability. Personally, I've always been a fan of "they don't know unless you tell them". So I tend to spread the word and make sure people know how I feel about them, for whatever it's worth.

As far as hearing from exes, all three of mine are married, last I heard. Haven't seen or heard from the latest one in years. That's perfectly fine by me.

Exposing Ourselves

hmmm, well, all or nothing? well id quote that billy joel song but alas im the only one who knows it so its wasted time. sure, we dont and cant expose every little thing about ourselves. we all have private things such as our true thoughts on that sweater she wore or that embarassing thing he said or whatever. however, theres a point when holding back is being emotionally dishonest. we all reach a point with people where we have to expose ourselves. through that exposure we grow in our relationships. be it the first time we say i love you or the first time we talk about an embarassing secret with someone. but its by exposing ourselves that we build trust with people. its like an ill show you mine you show me yours kinda thing.

shit, im not really one to talk much because i do my share of hiding, i just choose a different method. i throw out a bunch of chaff of nuttiness and shock and awe to distract from the fact that im often not comfortable in my own skin. but there comes a time when i have to drop the act and just accept. those are hard times, but they must come in every relationship or else it just wont work. its all about communication and trust. if you dont trust someone enough to communicate your true self then you shouldnt be with that person. and if you hesitate to open up and communicate your true self with people because youre afraid of getting hurt then youre a fool. everyone gets hurt, you cant avoid it unless you become a shutin.

and i dont know why kt keeps herself corseted. and it is like being corseted. i think only she really knows the reason. perhaps its the ultimate way to keep control. opening yourself gives other people an amount of control. i know all about control issues myself. lol! ultimately it comes down to fear. to quote dune, "fear is the mindkiller." and thats really true. think of all the things we dont do or things we do differently because of one fear or another. its nutz. fear rules all of our lives.

at this point it seems like kt is afraid of this thing with dino boy aka brad (i giggle every time i call him brad) turning out like other shitty past relationships. but one can never know until one tries. and if you go out and think its gonna be bad it will be. but it comes down to being ready and if kts not ready well then i guess shes not ready. but i think shes more ready than she gives herself credit for, shes just afraid. and thats ok. a gal like me whos gotten kicked in the gut and stabbed through the heart as many times as i have tends to build up a higher pain threshold. practice makes perfect right? lol!

so yeah whatever. we gotta keep muddling. relationships are the most important thing to me in my life. my friendships, etc are why i bother to hang around this shithole planet. and so thats why ill "gamble everything for love" (thanks ben lee!) because i see the possible reward as being valuable enough despite the chances of busting. everyone has a price they wont pay. my price is higher than most i guess.

as for my "love life" i got an email from dave the vet tech. he apologized for missing sunday. said he was asleep after a long overnight shift at the vet clinic. he seemed sincere in that he asked to make it up to me, but we shall see. we're hitting a comedy club maybe on sunday. im taking it slow.

and i soooo wanna know how v day went for kt. litmus test central yo!

as for exes, yes, my ex, andy, contacted me in regards to our dog, hudson. seems that andy is just too self-absorbed to continue to be responsible for hudson so hes getting rid of him. i find this highly upsetting and rude. you cant just dump your dog when he stops being fun and convenient for you. its called being an adult. and i cant take hudson because of my work schedule. i really wanna find him a good home because i feel i owe it to him and i feel responsible for him. i was his doggy mommy for a couple of years before andy took him in our split. what a fucking ass. then again he was never really all that warm and fabulous to begin with, andy that is. it would break my heart if hudson got put down because andys a dick. the world is cruel enough without shit like this going down. im so sad.

so what did s want anyways? looking to rekindle? or does he also have a dog he wants to dump too? sorry, i am very angry about this as i should rightfully be frankly.

anyways, time for gilmore girls and more curling curling curling! ah yum!

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

honesty

"all of the rumors, keeping me grounded, I never said (I never said) that they were completely unfounded"

Susan is correct. I am afraid of being open with people. There are parts of me that I keep all to myself. I'm protected that way. Everyone has their secrets. There are things that I don't tell Susan and that drives her nuts. There are things I don't tell Cathy, too, but she seems cool with that. I know she doesn't tell me everything.

So, question:
Do you have to be completely open, no holds barred, balls to the wall unfettered to be emotionally intimate with someone?
I say no. But you all may disagree.

************************************************
This must be old home week or something. Susan heard from A. I heard from S. Bizarre. Why all in the same week? Is there something in the water?

I've realized over the years that I learn a lot from the people in my life. Not so much liking people in general and being unwilling to let too many of them into my life may have hindered my learning processes. But I will always be incomplete -- a work in progress. Well, until death. Then you're done, right? Do you start to know that as you get old? Do you start knowing that your life is likely to end naturally in the near future? What does that feel like? It must not be all that inspiring, overall, since most of the elderly people I know seem to just be waiting for death. That's depressing. It sucks that you don't really appreciate the value of your youth and energy and the opportunities that come with both until you're one foot in the grave (not Morrissey one foot, but actual one foot).

The impetus for this? We have an annual volunteer social today. We honor the legions of volunteers without whom this agency would shut down by feeding them a lot of sugar. Most of our volunteers are retired. The old ladies all dress up -- red or pink, white hair. It's a sea of Hallmark cheeriness. In my contrary goodness, I'm wearing black and green. But I will put on my pink scarf before I head upstairs to feed senior citizens massive quantities of sugar. Cathy's going to punch them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(This is the 100th post of Truly Disappointing)

Monday, February 13, 2006

Curling

i command thee to go forth and watch curling. curling is chess on ice with canadians. curling macht spass. curling!!!!!

forethought

Okay, so how is it exactly that you always think you know what I'm going to say?

Here's my thought:

Stubborn is very close to Stupid. The boundary is not clearly marked and it's very easy to end up in the wrong territory by night without even realizing it. I know. I've been there SO MANY times that I've lost count.

You can't make things into what they aren't. Why does it happen? Because it happens. Neal was right. Suck it up and roll the damn bones.

Oh, and it IS possible to write and not post things.

*************************
Okay, on the vday theory. I am not "afraid" of emotional honesty. But I don't think the pink and red teddy bear hoopla of this idiotic holiday promotes honesty of any sort. I think people buy things and do things because they're guilted into it. I don't want to receive flowers and chocolate out of obligation. If something is done out of obligation, it means less than spontaneous thought and action. Obligation has its place, but I don't see that here.

But you're right with the hair of the dog theory. I have no problem finding relationship-minded men. I'm just not sure I want to go there.

I'm a lot shakier getting into something new than I thought I'd be. I've made my peace with the external aspects of the last fuck up -- as in, I'm okay with him existing and I think I know something about how/why we screwed things up. But I guess I haven't made peace with me, inside, about all that. I'm not as calm, cool, and collected as I thought. I'm so good at the fake out that I even fool me.

Dems Da Breaks

yes i suck. i couldnt sleep. my mind was wandering. it ended up on somebody it shouldnt have. ugh. yeah an email was written. no begging or weirdness just my peace. i still have that dumbshit hollywood notion that sometimes even if timings off the first time it can be right another time. somehow i seriously doubt that, but i felt i needed to communicate that. yes, i already admitted i suck.

it all started because i was thinking about connections. how you somehow have strong emotional connections to some people, less so with others, and in some cases none at all. i dont know why that is. what makes one person more important to you for no reason over someone else? i dont know. and i think its that mystery about the whole connections thing that compelled me to write that email. im very stubborn and i dont like giving up on things. its that german in me. and even though i know right now that the shit aint right, i still believe that connection was something and may be something down the road when the shit is right. yes, im sure its naive and stupid.

and its not like im waiting around for anything. though i wouldnt mind that surprise email or phone call months down the line or whatever when i least expect it and when he doesnt come into my mind anymore. though frankly i doubt that will ever come. i just didnt want to close that door until i told him my peace. i dont believe theres anything wrong with communication. and after having been kamikazied i think it only fair that i be accorded my peace when i can think clearly and have perspective.

but yeah, it still doesnt stop me from feeling slightly tooly about it because i know what kt will say. its just that i apparently have more of a phantom limb syndrome in these cases than she does. and sometimes i just have to indulge slightly. and if writing the email will help me get to sleep tonight then it was worth it. damn, im gonna be tired tomorrow getting up before noon, but dems da breaks i guess.

i really liked the connection i felt with him. but dems da breaks too. so is life.....

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Blug.....

well, sunday came and went. went to target and got some toilet paper, boneless buffalo wings, and monistat. the cunt funk has reared its ugly head again. is it considered a fungus because the package says anti-fungal. thats just nasty yo. hopefully my cunt will be back to "normal" soon. and im sure youre all glad of that.

as for dave the vet tech guy, no word. houdinied again i guess. talk about underscoring a recurring theme in my life. now its just getting comedic. if ya cant laugh about this shit youd just cry.

as for v day, huh, hardly v really. and im referring to like vj day etc aka victory day. i havent really had a v day man. frankly i doubt im missing much. every day should be v day with the one you love shouldnt it? as for kt, the going theory now about her anti-v day stance is because it involves a large amount of overt emotionalism and emotional honesty. those are hard things especially for a gal who doesnt particularly like those things. or doesnt seem to anyways. who knows. we all have our fucking problems. some are just a little more colorful than others.

its funny how things are fucked up in our lives. kt needs space in relationships but always meets men who want closeness. i need closeness in my relationships but i always meet men who disappear. i swear i could start a vegas illusionist show with all these houdinis. why is it this way? is it meant to teach us to become a little of what keeps poking at us? kt more emotionally close and me more emotionally distant? well, i gotta say, im on the fast track to that one.

its funny, i was talking to a buddy at work about past family experiences and dating and such. he was there the night i cracked and started crying at work after garrett called and dumped me. hes a nice guy my buddy. he hooks me up with part-time jobs. he told me that if he wasnt married and was younger and skinnier hed ask me out in a heartbeat. he said i was a good person and funny and really smart and gorgeous. huh, funny. im always befuddled when people i know tell me things like this.

oh, turns out frenchy, pascal, has the hots. hes emailed asking me out again. ugh, pascal, im sorry. part of me wonders if i should go out with him again because im missing something i should be seeing or feeling or if i should just cut bait because the gut wasnt there. im thinking cut bait. sorry mon petit pascal. he has a nice car though. vrooom.

and ive decided to get my brows done. ill be careful though, but im excited. one step closer to susans "perfection." its like im a this old house and im also bob villa. huh, go fig.

blug.....

V-Day and the Five Rings

Ah. The Olympics. Best thing about the Olympics? I don't live with Susan anymore. So I can more or less ignore the ENTIRE whorish spectacle. And I don't have to hear Bob Costas. At all. I love being in control of the remote.

The Knitting Olympics, though, I can get behind. I have from the bottom of the back piece of my sweater top up through almost the armpit decreases finished -- and we just started on Friday. There is a chance that I could finish this thing on time. I like a challenge.

And to the true meat of the week:
Vday.

I hate Valentine's Day with a passion normally reserved for things like Wal Mart or Bob Costas' human interest stories or the bullet in the gun of Robert Bjorn. Or Enya. HATE. Do not celebrate, do not do.

Well, I got asked to dinner. By the new guy. And I wasn't graceful enough to bow out quickly and acquiesced. Ugh. I feel bad about this, but really? Even if I liked the V-day celebration? This is a whole lot of pressure for a two week relationship. I did tell him I wasn't much into celebrating, and I hope he got the drift, but.......

Yeah, Susan has theories about me and the Hallmark Holiday, but I'll let her explain them if she feels the need.

MMMMMM The Olympics

oh thank jesus my internet is back and i managed to get back on with little effort and screaming. sad how my life revolves around this thing sometimes.

anyways, the olympics...

ok, i watched the last couple of days on my tivo. the opening ceremonies frankly blew like most do. is it required to do dumb shit where you highlight the terrain and culture of your country? ok, cultural stuff i can understand, but the dancing (and mooing) cows and trees were a little much for me. and of course the rollerbladers, why do they always use rollerbladers. dude, its not the starlight express, ok? that show doesnt even tour anymore, let the rollerbaldes go. but i do have to say that the actual lighting of the flame was cool. one of the best ive seen. theres no need for these tough oh am i gonna make it stunts to light the flame. oh and a question, why were they playing american disco music during the parade of nations? i was befuddled by that one.

so, the drama has already begun. michelle kwan, cunts already out. ow my groin hurts. go fuck yourself you fucking choker. you woulda fucked it up anyways. and theres a sexy texan speedskater whos gettin gold. that was a nice moment on the 13th anniversary of his grandmom's death. that always happens doesnt it, anniversarys of deaths etc on the day of the critical race. isnt it great how the drama just comes all built in like that? lol! still there havent been enough human interest/overcoming adversity stories for me yet. shucks.....

as for pascal, the french guy i went on a date with, he was nice, but the attraction just wasnt there. he was very sorta nerd. he wore a sweatshirt from his dojo. and he seems a little less high speed so to speak than id prefer. he just emailed me about last night and wants to go out again. ah, i can even charm the french, who knew? lol!

oh theres been a crash, a skier is down! and it looks like the defending gold medalist was taken out in the crash...oh my!!!

so yeah, pascal, i dont think i wanna go out again. the whole different culture thing as interest has worn off. he reminded me slightly of andy in his socialization. and he was skinny too. oh well, date wasnt horrible, just not fabulous.

as for dave the vet tech guy, we were supposed to go out again tonight but i havent heard hide nor hair from him. oh well, maybe im getting houdinied again. alas, theres more interesed boys out there vying for my attention. theres gregory the design guy and preston the possible hippy. these are the newest guys in the scene. ill explain the possible hippy comment later.

well anyways, i feel lazy today so im gonna snuggle in with my pussies and watch me some 'lympic action yo. ah the agony of defeat!