Truly Disappointing

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Que Sera Sera

well i finally met the original army boy, the infamous garrett. frankly i was surprised he actually showed up. we met in charlotte, nc. not a hugely happenin town but we didnt really leave the hotel so it wasnt a big deal. and i have to say he is soooo fucking hot. hes like an abercrombie and fitch model. and hes incredibly sweet and snuggly and when he smiles it melts my heart.

but.....

he doesnt talk much. that drives me batty. i cant deal with dating a mime. andy was a mime in bed which i could handle, but being a mime all the time, susie just cant roll with yo. and it breaks my heart because hes so great in every other way, but me being with someone who has trouble communicating is just a joke. i mean sure im not always great communicating either but i can at least friggin talk. sure i could talk enough for both of us but thats no fun. when you talk to someone you get to know them. when they dont talk you feel like you have no idea who they are. i dont wanna work that hard or be in the dark that much. thats just torture to me. who i am cannot handle silence all the time like that.

in the past i might have tried to push that issue to the side, but i really realized this weekend how important communication as a trait is for a potential mate or bf or whatever. i need someone who can keep up conversationally. ok, i need someone who can at least participate in conversation, he dont have to be a friggin toastmaster or anything.

mick was so right when he said you cant always get what you want. i so want garrett to be that guy because hes got so many things goin for him, but hopin and wishin wont make things so. at least i have the wisdom to know that now. it doesnt mean it doesnt hurt and sting and all that jazz, because it does, but it is how it is. que sera sera.

the world just aint fuckin fair.

1 Comments:

  • I have to tell ya' I'm impressed with you & your progress!! And hey, at least you're MEETING guys. More than I can say here... keep it up, good to hear how well you're doing!!

    By Blogger Tug, at 1:01 PM  

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