Truly Disappointing

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

my life in the vast lane

I have my quarterly board meeting this Friday. I am the executive secretary for said board, and as such, am responsible for, well, everything. Including making sure that enough of my 7 adult members show up. They are competent enough to have full-time jobs elsewhere, but there is an element of babysitting in getting them here.

So at work? Am chicken. With no head. Running in circles. Am good at it.
Or, if you prefer a different metaphor, I am a well-trained dog, with the hoop jumping and such. I? Am a good bureaucrat. Hence the hoops. And the jumping.

I am not at the moment good at writing in complete sentences.

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My parents didn't break me. They done good. There's a great poem out there about parenting. I can't remember the poet, so I can't look it up here -- I have it in a book at home.

It begins: "They fuck you up, your mum and dad,/ They don't mean to but they do"
I know it gets a little better. I'll find and post.

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On a personal front? Just trying to keep it all together. Still chatting with the guy. Still trying NOT to talk myself out of seeing where it goes. It's like starting a fire while camping. The fire is nice and friendly, warm and light, and it could keep you company well into the night. But rather than risk the conflagration that could happen were it to get out of control, you dump the bucket of water on top and put it out. No light and warmth, but no giant prairie fire, either.

I've got the bucket of water. It's my ledge. But I'm trying not to use it.

4 Comments:

  • Sounds familiar, that whole "keep guy at arm's length or longer" strategy. Just remember, you can't win if you don't play.

    By Anonymous Pinky, at 4:02 PM  

  • hey, dude, I so don't regret my friendship with you.

    It's not about winning. It's never about winning. It's about not losing yourself.

    By Blogger kT, at 5:10 PM  

  • Well, yeah, mostly cuz I'm damned cool (or at least in my own mind). :)

    In this case winning = giving something new a try, so in this case it is about winning. But you are right to be wary of losing yourself. Do try not to let that happen. I'm rather fond of yourself ;)

    By Anonymous Pinky, at 11:22 AM  

  • Thanks.

    But you're one of the good ones. Nice guys are hard to find.

    By Blogger kT, at 4:22 PM  

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